It was early 2000s and 1990s when I lived with my father and three of my younger brothers, after the divorce. Previously, we-the four brothers-lived with our mother until my mother decided that the kids belong to father's responsibility.
My father and his kids move from one rented house to another. The house we rented were somehow small. Once my father rented a two kavling of 3x4 meters house and make the house connected. Another time my father rented some kind of garage house with funny airway circulation design, thus the house was always hot.
On those houses, we live with no mother, which means we take care of ourselves which means we set schedules for warming the food, cleaning the house, and we took care of our own clothes.
Somehow my younger brother, unlike me, was a popular kid which hang out with another cool kids in school. While he and his friends hang out in our home, I keep doing the housework, even if it is his turn to do the housework. Well, I did that to avoid my father's wrath upon us all (yeah, it's a wrath not just rage because it was mostly much over the top).
I was oftenly avoid having a social companion, I always went to my room to avoid conversations, especially with my father. Thus, most nights I always pretend to be asleep when my father came home after work (unless if it was friday night, because friday nights were time for WWE Smackdown!).
On one of that night which I pretended to sleep, my father and my younger brother had a conversation about me. I did my favorite thing to do at that time, eavesdropping.
I was always considered to be the unpopular oldest brother. I was always so quiet, having my own mind, my own world, became a social outcast and had a very bad temper. Somehow that night all those labels of mine was about to be added.
They talked of how I, as the oldest brother, was the one who was not so bright kid among my friends and brothers. On the other hand, they were discussing of how I was the stupid son.
I remember that the teenage me was such obedient servant to my parent and family in terms of...serving them. Thus my life and social skills were left behind. I can ride bike when I was 17. My school scores were Nobita-ish, I was too honest (because I was too affraid of Jahannam and Al Maut back then), I was sucks in sport and I was too sentimental.
Well I will never forget that night of how my father and my younger brother perceived me. I didn't care. But I do now.
